Friday, January 25, 2008

A political Post

A friend of mine wanted me to do a political post about the primaries. So, I will oblige.

Ron Paul is completely unelectable. If he (by some miracle) wins the nomination, Hillary or Obama's win will give new definition to the word: landslide.

Huckabee - No.

Romney - No. He's also unelectable.

Guiliani - No. Y'all know how I feel about the second amendment.

McCain - Not my first pick, but I trust him to make good decisions in favor of our troops. His record is okay in regards to the 2nd amendment.

It's no secret that the man I agreed with most was Fred Thompson or Duncan Hunter. However, since Fred Thompson and Hunter dropped out, I will be voting for McCain. I don't agree with everything McCain has done, but he does uphold the issues that are most important to me. Some of the other issues, I can hold my nose. But, the most important issues are still there. Not only that, but he is only one of 2 people who has a chance at beating Hillary or Obama. And, I will NOT turn over the fate of my bro in Iraq to either of them.

That's what kind of gets me about people who say, "If a true conservative isn't going to win, then I'm not voting." Well, that's great for you to stand up for your principles. How about the basic principle of backing our troops? Do you really think our troops want Hillary or Obama to decide their fate?

Monday, January 14, 2008

Can I Have Fries With That Grenade Launcher?

SoHos reminded me of a recent story I told to my friends.

As many of you know, my buddy Corin was recently deployed to Iraq. I've been in communication with him via email since he's left. I'm always asking him if there's anything that he needs. We would do our best to send him whatever he wants/needs.

Some of the things he mentioned were typical. There was the blue powder Gatorade, a pack of handkerchiefs, Dunhill cigarrettes, etc. There was one request that caught my attention. Not because it was unexpected (actually, it was), but because it was something I thought might catch some attention from other folks. He asked me if I could find him a cleaning kit for his M203.

Now, Corin carries an M4, which is a shortened version of the M16. Attached to the underside of his M4 is a grenade launcher. That's the M203. I thought about this for a second. Then, it was too good to pass up. I walked into a local gun store here in New City. I asked the guy at the front desk:

Me: "Excuse me, do you have a cleaning kit for an M203?"

Guy behind the desk: "....M203....M203....M203...........(about 10 seconds go by)....Isn't that a grenade launcher?"

Me: "Yes."

Guy behind the desk: "...........................(I swear I got a full 30 second stare as if I were Al Qaeda standing in front of him)........"

I couldn't keep a straight face after 30 seconds, so I busted out laughing: "It's for my friend of mine who's in Iraq. He says they're short of them and could really use a cleaning kit."

Guy behind the desk: "..............OOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Well, I just don't think I have anything big enough to cover that. Go over to that wall and tell me what the biggest shotgun brush we have is."

Me: "....... 12 gauge."

Guy behind the desk: "Nope. Won't do. Sorry, sir."

Me: " That's okay. Thank you."

I left laughing the whole way home. Sometimes, you just got to have a little fun.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

For my Venison Lovers

This is what happens when a buck gets caught in a swing and panics trying to escape.

Now you know that's going to be very lean meat.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

I Demand Affirmative Action!

It has come to my attention that there are different races that are missing out on the college experience because people don't give a damn about racial diversity.

Scholarships are given with no consideration to the fact that there are people out there who deserve a chance to go to college without the burden of having to overcome stereotypes.

Therefore, I demand that we "expand" these millions of dollars of scholarship money to include more non-black athletic scholarships. These athletic scholarships shell out far more money per individual than any academic scholarship given per individual. I mean, if academic scholarships can't be given on the basis of personal achievement, then neither can athletic scholarships.

EQUALITY FOR ALL!!!!!!!!!!! Or, are you a RACIST?!

I DEMAND AFFIRMATIVE ACTION FOR ATHLETIC SCHOLARSHIPS. I want to see more racial equality to the collegiate sports teams!

If you oppose me, you're obviously a RACIST.

Karma's a bitch, ain't it?

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

The greatest password on Earth

My sister was helping my father with the computer the other day. Dad is not exactly very computer literate.

He did, of course, set up some sort of an email account. While trying to explain to him how things worked, my sister asked my dad to put in his password for his email account.

Dad entered: "1"....."2"....."3"....."4"....."5"

My sister responded, "Are you serious?"

Then my dad hit "Enter".